"She's always been such a sensitive girl..."

Well, turns out I did care. I cared a lot. I came to realize this when I kept getting upset. Things went from bad to worse until I couldn’t stand it any longer and broke down. I had tried his method of keeping quiet, not saying anything. “Not Caring”…. But it was under false pretenses because I actually did care and still do. Is it still love if you keep getting hurt? I think it is. Maybe love has made me ultra sensitive. Perhaps my feelings get hurt more easily now. Does that mean I’m insecure? Or just sensitive?

I hate that word “sensitive”. It has so many negative connotations: weakness, lack of a backbone, wishy-washy, crybaby. But it can also be a very awesome thing. To be sensitive is a kind and caring thing. If you harness that sensitivity you can use it for all sorts of good things. I think in order to be intuitive you would probably be sensitive as well. Being sensitive to others’ emotions, thoughts, and feelings can make one a master manipulator. It can be used for good or evil. A highly sensitive person could be a wonderful leader, doctor, teacher, mother, daughter, girlfriend. Highly sensitive people may also be artistic. Fragility poised on a ledge between reality and a dreamscape.  Some of the best musicians are sensitive. 


But then there is being overly sensitive, which I tend to be. To put it in the words of the recording artist, Feist, “I feel it all, I feel it all” I feel it alright, very strongly. The good and the bad, which makes it so difficult to balance the two. Must I sacrifice the good for the bad? How do I let go of my oversensitivity to bad but keep the good?


Learning to love oneself and to be comfortable in one’s own skin is an important life lesson I’ve always heard. One that I’m sure I’m still grappling with. But with each hurt and disappointment, sometimes it’s impossible to tell whether I’m moving ahead and growing stronger or falling behind. I guess I won’t know until I’m older.

Why Does Everyone Look Alike?

I've been thinking alot about human nature lately.  Nothing too deep or anything, just how funny humans can be.  That's exactly how I've been thinking about them: those humans.  Them.  Not us.  Not me.  Like I'm not human or something.  Like I'm an alien.  There is so much diversity in the world yet humans are basically the same everywhere.  There is always going to be people who annoy you, people who you like right off the bat. 

Corey Feldman

There's even it seems basic templates for how people look.  Sure, sure, everyone is unique, blah blah blah.  But how many times has someone told you that you remind them of somebody, or how you look just like so-and-so...  There are celebrity look-a-likes.  My boyfriend for instance looks like Corey Feldman.  I've gotten (a surprising number of times) Anna Faris.  You know, that chick from Scary Movie.  Every time I move to a new city I often have to look twice because I am reminded of people I knew in the past city by strangers walking in the street!

So next time you are in a busy street look around.  How many people look like someone else you have seen or who you know?  Think about all the faces, all the mixtures of features...  When you mix up ten kinds of chins, eight shapes of eyes, five different cheekbones, four basic shapes of face, six eyebrow variations, and lets say twelve noses, that's only ummm... 115,000, and change, different looks.  What about the other five billion, nine hundred ninety nine million, eight hundred eighty five thousand, and change, people???*  Thus everyone looks alike.  Sorry folks, I know we all think we are the unique ones, the "special" ones.  But we're not.  We are just a nose away from being our neighbor, whether that neighbor is across the hall or across the globe. 

*This statistic I am purely guesstimating based on a six billion total world population.  Since there is probably, by now, a shit-ton more people, well I guess that just makes us even less special now, huh?